lost hp... i can get a new one... but now, i lost my closest ppl... hw should i bring up lehz? i jus simply lost the whole world... my loved one n the one who luv me...

im back to loneliness

nw wen i step into my hse, im oni myself... all alone...

yea, since young im with my grandma n uncle, but nw, family issue made my life got upside-down... complicated... i jus noe i reali cant bear her to move out... but no one can make the decision... jus blame my elder uncle for being unfilial n unreasonable... i reali see thru guys... be it ai qin or qing qin... wadever guys say means it... wadever a guy mean he's not happy den he can tak up the action n it mus be finalise? i reali got pissed off n mad last nite... its for the 1st time i speak up so cruely, with cursed to them... i reali dun wan her to go... i reali wan to stay with her...

see, from young im not living with my dad n mum... my real mum abandon me... den?! the dad who bring me to tis world dun wan to be responsible for me... wanna give me off, but luckily my uncles n grandma "saved" me... so from young, im a gal with no parents takin care off de... tats why guanda will say me not family-sociable... but i nv want it! who dun wan to be born in a happy or rather jus a normal family? who dun wish to stay with their parents where dey understand em n listen to em? i jus wan a simple life.... a happy life... guanda said before, its all tis factors which push me to be so dependent towards him...

i dun have wad a normal gal has... happy family, or rather jus some family members by her side.. no one will listen n talk to me... i believe my negatives will make em go away from me... i may be laughing n smiling all the time wen im with em, but no one will noe the saddness i had in my heart wen im alone... no one noe the real me...

den since from young i had no motherly luv, i oni rmb my grandma's care... nw the unfilial guy chase her out den who cares for me? im all alone... its not a hse anymore... im too tired to be independent... i reali give up in my game... i admit im a loser..

i reali wan a shoulder to cry on... someone to make me smile n be by my side...